How Do You Want Me?
Following their marriage, Ian and Lisa move back to the village where she grew up, a village still dominated by her family. In order to try to fit in, Ian takes a job as the village photographer, a profession for which he is not really cut out.
Seasons
1. No One Can Hear You Scream
Air Date: 1998-02-24
Newly-weds Lisa and Ian Lyons move from London to her home village in rural Suffolk. Ian has trouble adapting to country life when he offends his wife’s farming family over dinner. Then he exacerbates the animosity Lisa’s family have for him even further at the grand opening of a new turkey barn. Meanwhile when Ian struggles to find suitable employment, he takes over the local photography business.
2. Floppy, But Not Too Floppy
Air Date: 1998-03-03
Ian finally receives his first business assignment: taking the primary school annual photograph. However, things don’t go quite to plan as his inexperience shows through and the students and staff are not as co-operative as he had hoped. Lisa’s father is determined to get his son in law to return to London and offers him a substantial sum of money to encourage him to leave. Meanwhile Lisa has problems of her own when it becomes apparent that her ex, Derek, still harbours feelings for her.
3. Monstrous
Air Date: 1998-03-10
Some intimate photographs of Ian and Lisa cause a stir when they are posted around the village. Desperate to ingratiate himself with the villagers, Ian joins the local football team but quickly begins to regret his decision.
4. Woof!
Air Date: 1998-03-17
Derek’s continued obsession with Lisa creates friction. To support a village charity gala, Ian invites one of his friends from the London comedy club to perform. However his friend’s style of stand up proves to be a little too much for the audience.
5. The Hidden World of Country Fire Stations
Air Date: 1998-03-24
Ian travels round with the local fire service when he decides to write a book about them however, he uncovers a swindle they don’t want revealed. Lisa has a constant flow of visitors and Ian begins to feel claustrophobic.
6. Sausage, Balloon, Bum
Air Date: 1998-03-31
There is a scandal in the village when Ian is accused of hitting a young boy. The Lyons find rural life rather dull and decide to enter the local bridge competition.
1. White Pubic Hair
Air Date: 1999-11-10
When Ian falls through the barn roof, he is convinced that his father-in-law is trying to kill him. Lisa finds directing the school play rather stressful and takes up fishing to relieve tension.
2. I’m Not an Alcoholic
Air Date: 1999-11-17
Lisa disagrees with the Headmaster about how the students should address the teachers. Ian gives up alcohol and has great difficulty getting hold of a drink when he wants one. Meanwhile, Dean is more than happy to share his mushrooms with Ian.
3. Nude Modelling Module
Air Date: 1999-11-24
Ian runs a photography course in an effort to improve business. However, he has issues with an unwanted admirer and is unable to find the nude model he promised his students. Meanwhile, Lisa is determined to write a novel but lacks inspiration.
4. Bad Builders
Air Date: 1999-12-08
Derek has problems when he hires Dean to redesign his kitchen. Meanwhile, Ian agrees to look after Helen’s clothes shop while she is on holiday. All seems to be going well until his role as temporary manager goes to his head.
5. Ready, Steady, Kill
Air Date: 1999-12-15
Ian takes up shooting in an effort to bond with his father-in-law. Unfortunately, Ian alienates himself further and ends up shooting someone. Helen thinks she’s unattractive and Lisa organises a photography session for her to help cheer her up.
6. The Pleasures of Village Life
Air Date: 1999-12-22
Ian struggles to find somewhere to live and Dean seems to be the only available option. Helen and Derek get close. Lisa’s father begins to recover and gives Ian an ultimatum: leave the village or be arrested for attempted murder.
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Rating
7.7/10
Release Date
1998-02-24
Episodes
12 (2 seasons)
Status
Ended
Cast
Production Companies
Kensington Films & Television